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Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Back To Writing

I am slowly getting back to writing blogs again. I plan on doing a little writing each morning. The past few months have been extremely rough around my home. I took a break from blogging because I did not have the energy and could not get my thought process to think about anything but the pain. I am determined to not let the past defeat me or define who I am. I am a blogger, photographer, a mother, and a woman.


A little recap: A few months ago, I learned my ex-fiance and the perfect man was a monster in disguise. He had been sexually abusing my daughter for several years. The only reason I found out is thanks to an Amber alert going off on an old phone he took several videos on. If it wasn't for that Amber alert, I would have never found out.


A week or so before finding out, I started praying to God. I had tears in my eyes and shakiness in my voice. I prayed to God that I wanted my little girl back. I knew she was screaming for my help and attention but I had no clue what she was trying to tell me. I got exactly what I asked for.


 When you say a prayer, make sure you really are looking for the answer because God will give it to you. It may not be in the way you choose or a way you would even think of. God will answer your prayer just the same.


I'm not trying to make this a religious post. As I know not all my readers believe in God or believe in the same things as I do. Heck, my teenage son doesn't believe in God at all. he chooses to believe in Science. I am trying to tell my story from when my world came crashing down around me to the point where I could do nothing but cry. I was broken. I still am broken. Yet, I choose to put myself back together. Even though I know it will get worse before it gets better.

Til another blog, where I will divulge more. 

Photos from Pixabay, a free use photo sharing website. 

17 comments :

  1. I am happy to see you writing again. Your family survived something horrible, but you are strong enough to not let it control what the rest of your life becomes. I'm happy you were the right kind of mother, who chose to protect your daughter instead of the other way around.

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    1. Thank you, I may not be the best mother in the world but I want to be a strong role model for my daughter. I want her to know I love her and she is much smarter than what people give her credit for.

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  2. Hello. I am so sorry! My father was a serial child molester, a deacon in the Assembly of God church, and a boy's Sunday school teacher. I lived my whole life trying to be invisible because of what he did. My mom made us cover it up and took his side and blamed us. I'm 64, and i only came out of denial a couple years ago and started trying to be someone else. I love that you care enough about your child to take her side and protect her. I would like to hear more of your story. You have inspired me to go back to the blog I began and tell my story. It helps others to know they are not alone. Blessings to you.

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    1. I looked forward to hearing your side of the story. I think more victims need to speak out and tell their story. It not only helps as a release but like you mentions lets others know they are not alone.

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  3. You are a strong woman and you and your daughter will get passed this. keep the faith god will bless you.

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    1. Thank you Angie, I am slowly getting passed this. I am going back to being me. All those walls I placed up or whatever he did to my head i am slowly tearing away and becoming me again.

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  4. Dear Sandy, I am so glad to see you posting again. When life gives us a kick in the backside, we have two choices. Fight like mad or give up! I'm glad to see you fighting like mad. These next few months will be difficult for sure, but you have already faced the Devil and won. If you ever need a spirit boost or someone to talk to I will be here. Prayers go out to you and all your family. May your brokenness heal and make you even stronger than before. That's my prayer for you!

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    1. Thank you for the support Grammie. I really am fighting like mad to regain the person I use to be at the same time trying to save my daughter. She had issues to begin with which are more prominent now. I have always enjoyed reading your blogs.

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  5. I am so sorry what you and especially your daughter have been through. I am glad you found it out so the misery of your child stopped. May that molester be punished of what he had done. Take care and good luck to more writing journey.

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    1. I do hope he gets what he deserves. I am finding it doubtful at the moment as the prosecuting attorney is not wanting to give to make him serve more than 5 years. I am hoping more but will take what I can get at this point.

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  6. So glad to see you back to writing but I'm so sorry for all you have been through. I remember reading some of blogs when your daughter wasn't "herself" and now you have the answer. I can't imagine the pain she has gone through and you also. I pray that God carries both of you out of this darkness and you both can move on and never look back. Hugs!

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    1. Thank you Martha, your words mean so much to me. I do believe God is shining the way out of the darkness. Some days are better than others. It is a struggle for sure. I look back and understand many things that I didn't at the time. Weird, how one can look back and reflect and notice something they missed before.

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  7. Glad your strength is returning to begin writing again ... keep on fighting through --

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  8. I look forward reading blogs. I use my blog as my thearpy.
    Coffee is on

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